


Dishonesty and Deception

by Amare_Deansgate



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, Thor (Movies), Thor - All Media Types
Genre: Abuse, Angst, Domestic Violence, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, F/M, Implied/Referenced Rape/Non-con, Romance, Violence
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-01-18
Updated: 2015-09-17
Packaged: 2018-01-09 05:19:48
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 4
Words: 4,093
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1141939
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Amare_Deansgate/pseuds/Amare_Deansgate
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>With the choice of any woman in the cosmos, Darcy finds finds herself both horrified and flattered when Loki, brother of Thor, God of Mischief, begins to court her. However, danger lies behind even dancing with the devil, as she finds herself running from her own past when it rears it's ugly head.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Prologue

Could anyone describe this pain? The shear hurt that ripples through and tears everything apart starting from the heart.

It's an anguish of being led into something that didn't mean anything in the first place.

A lover with false promises of security and pretenses of being together forever, that's all she received from being with him. And now it is, what she hopes, his turn to feel this throbbing grief of lonesomeness.

He paid no attention to her agony. He only ever paid attention to how she presented herself when they were in public eye. She's grown drained from living this lie.

She misses her friends. He took her away from everything she ever treasured and mistreated her. Mentally at first, words like "worthless" and "tramp" where only the beginning of his cruelty. Once he turned to actually harming her physically, she made a point of not getting in his way when he was upset, making sure she did everything perfectly. Maybe she was doing something wrong.

But when she noticed that the assaults still didn't stop, she gave up. Whether or not she became tired or lazy, she doesn't know. All that she can think about is about the fact that his hands feel cold and harsh on her pale skin. Bruises seem to be the last thing on her mind when she goes out and people glance skeptically at her.

She wants to leave. If she could kill him or run she definitely would, but he's much stronger than her, he would kill her before she could even get the chance to pick up a knife.

She sits up slowly, making sure the bed doesn't stir too much and reaches over toward her nightstand. When she tugs at the drawer, the wood composes a whining noise almost like a cry to awaken her husband.

She looks over quickly to see if he's awake already, but he only stirs a little. She turns back around and says a silent prayer that the drawer would just stay silent. As she pulls again the drawer makes the same noise, but much more hushed. She decides it's not enough to wake him and proceeds.

She grabs an old heavy box and slowly slides it out and away from the table. She opens it to see in the moonlight that her rings are still there. Not the rings she'd received from him, no. She was handed them by her mother on her wedding day. "Something old", she smiled at the memory of her mother's voice. Of course now she wouldn't take them out in front of her husband, but her mother gave her this blue box to keep them in the day of her wedding. She was told her that their family- her adopted mother's family- used it for generations and it had a compartment in it that could be used for safe-keeping.

She slowly takes out the rings and gently places them on the nightstand. She stares at them for a few seconds before going back to the task at hand.

She slides away the bottom of the box to find the other section hiding her newly placed item.

She withdraws the large metal object and sets it. Effectively causing a sharp sound to echo throughout the bedroom. Now she needs to be quick. She turns the object around so that it's facing her and brings it up to her temple.

She'd thought long and hard about this. She doesn't feel tears well up in her eyes as they usually do when she's afraid. She'd given her life to this man, and now she that she knows he can't control her anymore, an almost mad smile tugs at the side of her mouth as she pulls the trigger.


	2. The Recovery

There is blood on the pillow. As crimson and violent as the act that caused it. Her belief that she would be free wasn't enough to finish the deed, however. There is a numbness that she’s never felt before when she sees his eyes looking down at her. 

When she is in the hospital later, they tell her she’s lucky. The bullet grazed her skull and left a scar, but she would survive. She doesn't feel she’s survived. She’s been dead for a long time.

After a few weeks, she’s moved to the psychiatric unit of the hospital. For the first week, she stood in the mirror looking at the healing wound on the side of her head. She thought she felt nothing at first. But soon she wakes up in the middle of the night screaming and crying. The nurses and doctors put her into an isolated room and sedate her countless times a week.

One morning, long after she thinks she’ll be here forever, a nurse walks into her room with a bright smile.

“Darcy,” she says. “I have some good news.”

Darcy brings her eyes slowly up to the nurse.

“You’ll be going home on Monday. Your doctor said that you’ll be starting outpatient care soon.”

The effort to smile is too much. She nods and turns back to look at the rain hit the window.

When the nurse leaves, Darcy curls her legs up to her chest. Her hair had grown over the scar, but she can still feel the long bump under her scalp.

The feeling overtakes her. She can leave now; start anew. Something akin to relief is swept through her. All she has to do is forget. Forget her past with him.

If only it were that easy.

...

It’s almost three years pass after being released that Darcy is able to start her life again. She starts college,majoring in political science, and is no longer eager to please others. Even if she is unable to completely tune out of her nightmares, she smiles more and is able to see that she stays focused on school.

The past seems like another life altogether. And instead of making her bitter, it’s made her better. She almost wants to thank him.

The wind blows fiercely against the curtains of the open window of her dorm room. It brings with it a scent of the autumnal spices of the dormitory’s Halloween party. The room, almost an uncomfortable cold to most, felt claustrophobic and dense. She sits on the edge of her bed, fighting away the invisible monsters in her head.

She doesn't know where he is now. When she was still in the hospital, papers were sent to her. Legal papers telling her she was no longer married on grounds of insanity.

Here, though, no one knows of that ugly past. They know her as vivacious, featherbrained, and even downright childish. But never broken; never agonized.

It’s funny, though, when one is left alone with the thoughts in their head that tells them the reality of their own world it feels a bit like home. Poison caught her heart long ago and mangled it until all she has is an empty cavity in her chest. It hurts everyday to think she once felt something as sweet and wrong as love.

Right now she can’t find the energy to go to sleep. The room feels as though it lives and whispers with it’s hot breath into her ear. It’s his voice, when he was sweet and kind and gentle and lovely.

She feels her skin grow uncomfortable as though it weren't meant for her own body. Running her hand on her arm, she feels goose-flesh as if thousands of invisible tiny strings tried to pull her like a puppet.

She’s knows she’s still young. She was very young even when she met him. Just starting college on a scholarship, and not caring an ounce about where she might be headed. Then he came; his promises feather-light and his tongue like silver.

She feels everything and nothing for him. Like she can fall in love with him again and kill him in cold blood in the same instant. Her chest is on fire. She needs sleep. But there are more hours of wakeful turning to deal with before she is finally able to lay peacefully.

In the morning she walks into her first class of the day; playing the part of clueless student. She sits in the back even though it is her favorite course. When everyone is dismissed, her professor, Dr. Allen, calls her over.

She walks over to him, a small smile on her face as if to ask him what he wanted to talk about.

When her professor tells her about an opportunity to earn more credit hours outside of school, she jumps to apply as an assistant of the astrophysicist, Jane Foster.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hiya guys, working on the third chapter and am almost done with it. Thanks for taking the time to read and I hope you do enjoy the story.


	3. The Fresh Start

On the morning of her first day in Puente Antiguo, New Mexico, Darcy tries to find everything good about this new experience that she can. The small apartment she’d moved into was already furnished and cheaper than what she had paid for her dorm room. It is quiet, she notices. But, it’s not suffocatingly so. She breathes in the scent of food from the cafe downstairs: chocolate, coffee, and sandwiches.

She feels she’s definitely going to enjoy it here.

Brushing the hair out of her face with her hand she picks up her suitcase from the doorway with the other.

The door isn't closed behind her for a second before her cellphone rings. She makes her way over to her bed and drops the heavy bag down before getting the chirping object out of her pocket.

“Hello?” she says into the receiver.

“Hi, Darcy?” a voice says on the other end. “It’s Jane. Jane Foster.”

“Oh! Hi.”

“Did you find everything alright?” Jane asks.

“Definitely, thanks. I just got in actually.” Darcy starts walking toward the fridge realizing how hungry she feels. “I might get something to eat soon, though.”

Opening the fridge, she sees it’s completely empty besides a couple of water bottles in the back. “Are there any good restaurants around here?” She closes the fridge door and turns around to frown at thin air.

Jane perks up. “Actually, my mentor, Dr. Selvig, and I are going to go to a diner nearby your place. Do you just want to meet us there?”

“Sounds great. What’s the name? I can MapQuest it.”

“It’s Isabela’s Diner. It’s just down the street from you, really. Corner of Copper and First.”

After Jane tells Darcy she’ll actually be meeting her at eleven thirty, Darcy decides that is enough time to unpack her things and take a shower.

Emerging from the steaming glow of the bathroom, Darcy strolls across the wood floor to grab the fluffy towel she’d left hanging over the railing of her bed. She wraps it around herself and combs her fingers through her wet hair slowly.

As she does this, she walks around her new apartment; trying to map it in her head and get used to the surroundings. Near the sitting room is a fairly large window covered by vertical blinds. She pulls apart a tiny section to look through.

This is a very small town. She can see past it and into the open desert from where she stands. The people below walk leisurely; not in the almost frantic rush that she was used to in her home town.

Humming to herself, she walks around the sitting area of the apartment and sees that a stereo is plugged into the wall with an iPod classic sitting on top.

Scanning through it, she sees that there’s really nothing on it. Maybe someone had left it here by accident.

It takes her a couple of minutes to get dressed in a long sleeved shirt and jeans, and then she’s back in the small bathroom.

Looking in the mirror above the sink, Darcy can see her chocolate hair in a mess of curls. She almost laughs as she gingerly picks up her brush and combs it over the still damp surface.

She’s almost done when she hears the buzz of what she assumes to be the doorbell. Walking towards it, the buzz sounds in three more impatient cries. She calls before her, “I’m coming.”

It buzzes once more before she can open the door. Opening the door Darcy is about to invite in who she believes to be Jane, when she is confronted by an empty hallway.

“Hello,” she calls letting her right foot out and into the narrow passageway and leaning slightly forward.

She slowly shakes her head in confusion and re-enters the room. When the door is closed behind her, the buzzing comes again in sporadic successions.

Her hearts jumps at the sound. Looking frantically around her, she finds her eyes landing on her handbag. Swiftly making her way towards it, she pulls out her taser and arms herself.

It’s when Darcy can finally see the actual doorbell when she calms herself down. It’s an intercom system, probably connected to the apartment’s front door. Walking over, she lowers her taser to her side, and pressing the button labelled “talk”. “Who is it?” she says into the mic.

Letting go, she can hear Jane’s voice come through static. “Hi, yeah. It’s Jane. Can you come down?”  
She pushes the button once more. “Yeah, just let me get my things.” Letting go, she looks down at her taser. The taser she’d bought as soon as she left the hospital, and had acted as a security blanket for her after all these years. She finds it hard to put back into her purse when she’s has to leave.

Once at the bottom of the stairs, she sees who she assumes to be Jane, through the large front window near the door, looking down at a cell phone. Although she can barely see Jane’s face because of her light brown hair obscuring it, she can she that she’s gorgeous. Darcy opens the heavy front door and gets Jane’s attention. “Sorry for making you wait,” she says, closing the door behind her with a thud.

Jane doesn't look up but replies. “Yeah. Dr. Selvig’s already at the diner, we should get going.”

They walk for only a minute before reaching reach Isabela’s. The sun beats down in long waves of warmth, and there doesn't seem to be a cloud in the sky. The only relief comes from the slight awning in front of the door of Isabela’s Diner.

Jane goes ahead and pushes open the metal door. Following her, Darcy feels the sudden icy blast of air conditioning and, while it’s a relief at first, she soon has to wrap her arms around herself for warmth.

She follows Jane toward a small square table in the middle of the diner and sees an older man already seated there. His back is to them and he seems to be reading the large paper menu in his hands.

“Erik.” The older man turns around in his chair at the mention of his name. Smiling he gets up to greet them.

“Jane, it’s good it see you again,” he says hugging her.

“You too, Erik.” Jane returns the gesture and turns to acknowledge Darcy. “This is Darcy Lewis, the intern I told you about. Darcy, this is Dr. Erik Selvig, my advisor and professor of astrophysics.”

“It’s nice to meet you, Ms. Lewis,” Erik says with a smile. He extends a hand.

“Call me Darcy.” She grabs his hand but releases it almost immediately. She doesn't like to be touched.

“Right, Darcy then. So what was it that you study? Is it Astrophysics, Astronomy, Science perhaps?”

She hesitates. “Yeah... something like that.”  
Selvig nods and turns back to Jane. “Donald said that he was on his way. He told me we should wait for him.”

Jane nods slowly and walks to the seat across from Erik.

“Please, sit down,” he says to Darcy with a smile.

Darcy mumbles a thanks in return and takes the seat to the right of him.

Jane and Dr. Selvig go into a conversation about anomalies of stars and wormholes, and Darcy is staring at her phone’s dictionary typing in almost every other word she hears. An Anomaly: a deviation from the common rule, type, arrangement, or form. Synonyms abnormality, exception, peculiarity. Jane seems to be stuck on that word the most. Some weird things happening in the stars that she wants to research and why she wanted to create this team for investigation and long late-night trips to get better views of said stars.

Even if this would be her job while she stayed in New Mexico with Jane Foster and Erik Selvig, she can’t help but let her mind wander. It isn’t until another man takes a seat at the threesome’s table that she’s pulled from her revelries.

When she does look up, her heart nearly stops. She’s openly staring across the table at their new guest.

Jane is just about to introduce the newcomer when he speaks before she opens her mouth.

“Darcy?” he says when he looks up.

“Donald,” Darcy seems to say to herself in a low whisper. A wide smile breaks into her face.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here's chapter three, please comment. Tell me if you liked it or hated it. <3


	4. An Old Friend

She can feel his hot breath on her -surrounding her- underneath the covers. But she makes no verbal or physical objections to what he expects of her as a wife. Darcy hands over herself for him to take over and over again. Who is this new beast she’s found herself married to?

This afternoon, he’d come home from work and, having not said a word to her, she believed herself to be in the clear. Dinner was ready, prepared, and still warm when he walked in the door. She’d learned to cook from her mother at a young age. She was exceptional at creating delicious foods that her cousins and friends often begged her to make. Tonight she made steak in mushrooms and leftover red wine from a get-together recently thrown at the house. And her timing was perfect, unlike the past few nights when he came home early and without notice.

She is looking down at her plate,to; the food cold and pushed around by her small fork in a feigned attempt at actually eating the meal. Her heart contracts when she hears her husband’s fork tap against the wood of the table.

Looking up slowly she sees that, while he does make eye contact with her, he pushes back his chair and moves away from the table. He's tired, she imagines. Good. Too tired to talk means too tired to argue or yell.

She’s cleaning up the dishes when the doorbell rings. The posh sound fills the home suddenly. It seemed to be a hushed whisper, but still too loud after such a quiet night. Taking a glance at the clock mounted on the wall near her, she sees that it’s 9:56.

The neighbors must have lost their dog again. The Millers, the family next door had gotten a puppy last week for their oldest boy, a spoiled nine-year-old. For the past five days the mother, Hannah, had been unable to keep the thing in the house. Darcy didn't want to suggest an invisible fence for it, and helped Hannah whenever her own husband wasn't around. They’d become close over the months and she needed some company right now.

Opening the door, she sees a smiling face, but not the one she’d been expecting.

“Darcy!” She’s pulled into a hug before she can get a word out.

Darcy feels a grin fit upon her face, but it disappears in an instant. She pulls away from the embrace with a jerk. “Donald! What are you doing here?” Her voice is a frightened whisper.

“Your best friend flies halfway across the country to see you, and this is the welcome you give him?” He keeps the smirk on his face, thinking she is only upset about him showing up unannounced.

“Please,” she says, unconsciously trying to push him back out of the doorway. “Please. You have to leave.”

Donald catches on to her anxious disposition with those words and grabs her lightly on both of her shoulders. “D,” he whispers, looking into her eyes, “what’s wrong?”  
Darcy opens her mouth to speak when an “ahem” sounds out behind her. Her bones stiffen and she steps away from Donald again, this time giving much more distance than necessary.

Looking from Darcy to the other side of the room, Donald sees Darcy’s husband smiling calmly. “Hey, John,” Donald says coolly. “Long time no see, huh?”

John chuckles and makes his way into the room. “Don? Wow, we haven’t seen you since the wedding.” He walks right to Darcy’s side and pulls her close at the hip.

“Yeah,” Donald says back. “Wanted to surprise Darcy with a visit, you know?”

John’s fingers have bruising force on her at this point. “No, yeah. Come on in,” he waves into the house. “Make yourself at home.”

Donald comes in with a small suitcase behind him. “Thanks man.” He gives Darcy a look, noticing that she’s been silent since John entered the room.

John leaves Darcy to show Donald to the guest room, telling him to stay as long as he likes, and that no, it’s no trouble at all.

Darcy finishes the dishes and, making sure everything is neat and tidy, heads back to her bedroom.

Opening the door, she’s pulled into the darkness.

“You even smell like him.” She hears the words like a hiss on the back of her neck.

“I – I didn't know Donald was coming,” her voice breaks. “He just-“

He cuts her off before she can speak again. “Don’t.” He spins her around to face him. “Don’t lie to me, you filthy whore.” His mouth crashes onto hers, biting and bruising like his words.

She’s pushed back and John orders her to get out of her clothes as he turns on the bedroom light.

John doesn't bother to close the door, and watches her with dark eyes.

With shaking hands, Darcy takes her time unbuttoning her blouse. Her breaths come out fast and she wants to disappear. She can feel her eyes beginning to water.

John becomes impatient and is on her in a second. His hands rip apart her blouse.

Half dragging her across the room, he is at her neck now. The bits that he leaves keep bringing terrified gasps out of Darcy. “John,” she sobs silently. “John, wait.”

He pulls back to look at her. “No,” is his only word as he pushes her back onto the bed.

…

Don left that morning. During breakfast he didn’t look Darcy in the eye even once. She tried to keep in touch with him, but as her relationship with John deteriorated, so did her relationship with Donald. She hadn’t seen him face-to-face since that day. But now here he is, sitting next to her as they and the two astrophysicists drive in silence toward the lab that Jane worked on for years.

Darcy works on picking the polish off of her fingernails when Donald finally speaks to her.

“Darcy?” he ventures quietly.

She looks up at him. “Hmm?”

He looks down hesitantly.

Putting her hands down, she turns her upper body to face him. “What is it?”

“It’s just… how are you doing?”

‘Fine’ would have been a good word to say. She isn’t sad or angry. She’s missed Donald’s friendship, but isn’t prepared to cry on his shoulder and tell him about all that had happened during her marriage with John. So instead she lies and tells him, “I’m doing great.”

He smiles sadly at that and goes back to looking out of his window. “I called your mom, you know?”

Darcy’s heart skips.

“She told me what happened,” he says still looking out of the car window, “everything that really happened, that is.”

Looking to the front seat, Darcy can see Jane and Selvig in another heated conversation. She turns her head back to look at Don.

“You could’ve trusted me, D. If I had known what was really going on, I would’ve…”

“Would have what, Don?” Darcy whispers. “Left me alone with him like you did the last time I saw you?”

“I didn’t think he was hurting you,” John nearly shouts back. He turns to face her. “I thought that was your way of telling me you didn’t want me there.”

The front of the van is suddenly silent. Looking forward, Darcy sees Jane glancing back through the rear view mirror.

She feels her face burning. “Let’s talk about this later,” she says.

Almost feeling his frustration, she hears Donald mutter, “yeah. Later.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This frickin' fic is back on. I've got nothing to do but write, so kick my butt if I don't. And leave a comment if you want telling me what a bad person I am.


End file.
